Saturday, December 18, 2010

Snowed In

Well, here I am, still in Ann Arbor, lazying about with a laptop on my lap, wondering how to spend my extra day in a fun, productive manner. I've already watched a show; I guess I should head to the kendo apt at some point to chill and receive cookies.

My flight to Amsterdam was cancelled yesterday due to the MOTHERFUCKING SNOWSTORM that is striking large chunks of the European continent.

My brother, who somehow had been able to go to Frankfurt, is currently stuck in the Frankfurt airport for hours on end. At least he's in a location where, should the worst come to be, my dad can pick him up via car.

Although the Prague airport is been told to be fine, it does make me worry about whether I'll actually get home. Getting stranded in Detroit where I have an apartment to go to is one thing. Getting stranded in JFK with a bunch of strangers is another.

Also, I have to see whether I can procure an extra airbus ticket, though it kinda seems unlikely.

Also, being stupid, I haven't eaten. Sigh.

This winter just decided to mess with me, hasn't it?

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Mindscrew

It's Wednesday evening, and I'm slaving away on my final psychology project for PSYCH 303. This extension had better be valid, otherwise I have a legitimate reason to object to any potential grading penalties.

In order to finish this project, I have been slaving away at night, going to bed at ungodly hours for about two days in a row. As a result, my brain has kind of melted, which leads to this sort of visions in my sleep.

1: I dreamt that my family and I were in the airport going to the States, and we had a pet squirrel. The airport guy asked if we were taking the squirrel along.
"It will be xxx dollars", he said, which I don't remember the price, but it was way more than any sane man was willing to pay.
We stared at each other in silence, and I said, "Well, it's just a squirrel. There's plenty of squirrels in the US, too".
Everyone agreed. I let the squirrel loose outside the airport.



"...You're abandoning me? How could you?"

***

2: Unrelated to the first dream, I had somehow gotten myself lost in a huge airport duty free store. Also, horror of horrors, I was stark naked. Somehow I was trying to take a shower in the store for some incomprehensible reason, but the shower room was occupied by some old man, which left me stranded outside. To add to the mortification, Antai found me there.


(oh dear god why.)

As most sane people would react if they were seen by their friend with nothing but their birthday suit IN AN AIRPORT, I panicked, HARD.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I'M SO SORRY I TRIED TO TAKE A SHOWER AND THEN I GOT STRANDED AND THIS USUALLY DOESN'T HAPPEN TO ME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" I wailed. Antai was surprisingly chill about all this. "Aww, don't worry, I'll help you," he said.
He somehow got me some clothes to wear, and he washed my hair. I said "EHHHH?! it's okay I can wash my hair myself NO REALLY", but he did it anyway.

...I have no other explanation than that this is how I generally feel when Antai feels the need to correct my kendo, as I am not as good as I would like to be and generally feel horribly ashamed of myself when something doesn't go right. But you know, it still doesn't stop me from going "WHAT THE FUCK, THAT IS ALL SORTS OF AWKWARD AND WRONG."


***

3: I was in a lecture hall, taking the last lecture of... some class, I'm not sure (ENG 376?), and Robert randomly decided to audit it. The professor walked around the seats to see if we took proper notes, chatting up with the students along the way. I have no idea why. When he came to me and looked at my notes, he remarked that my doodles were nice.
Embarrassed, I muttered "It helps me concentrate". He then wanted to check what sort of makeup I had on. I didn't have any makeup on, and I told him so.

***

4: I dreamt that I kept walking past a yellow rooster; there was a whole story behind this and the yellow rooster was a sort of symbolism, but I no longer remember.


Then I ran towards a yellow suitcase at a parking lot.



Then somehow I was Harry Potter, and the yellow suitcase was mine.



"Hey, Harry, wanna ride the car back home this year? We can take a drive through London!" Ron Weasly said as he pointed to his non-magical black van that he procured from god knows where.
"Well, sure, but you're forgetting that neither of us know how to drive," I said.

 "Yeah, remember that last time?"

 After Ron left, I, for some reason, went inside the car and fiddled with the stick. WHY I WOULD DO THAT AFTER STATING THAT I CAN'T DRIVE IS A COMPLETE MYSTERY. I guess that's how Harry Potter rolls.

I accidentally started the car and it started to move on its own. I tried to stop it, but I failed, and as the car entered the road, I had no choice but to drive it to get it out of the way somehow. I had somehow gotten myself into five consecutive police chases, but by and large came out unscathed. I used magic to make the car invisible and drove on.

Moments later, I had ended up in some downtown area where they were blaring Latin music. I used magic to apparate the car back to the original place, thinking I was safe to walk here.

Oh, was I ever so wrong.

 Not exactly Park Guelle, but the general structure is similar. The dreamscape resembled a downtown area that I passed on the way to Park Guelle.

There seemed to be some sort of festival going on in the area; ladies in colorful dresses were dancing to the music. Other people were dancing to the music, screaming, cheering. The atmosphere was so festive, everyone seemed so cheerful there. Confettis were all around and sprays of red occasionally flew about the air.


That was when I saw piles of dismembered human flesh and organs laid around my feet.
When I looked up, I saw that thin slices of raw meat flew out of nowhere and latched itself onto some people. The people still danced around with meat stuck on their bodies, except with a look of panic and danced frantically, maniacally, as if to get the meat slices off. They stuck onto the bodies as if they were also part of them.



In sight of the meat, dozens of people dived forward, trying to eat off the raw meat. The victims screamed. The crowd cheered. I saw a man with his entire torso eaten, blood shooting out of his body like a fountain, while his legs still twiched and the people, covered in blood, still biting hunks of flesh out of him.

I felt like I was going to throw up, not to mention that, "HOLY FUCK I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW."

I ran back with all my might, when suddenly a piece of raw meat wrapped itself around my leg. I screamed and kept on running, praying that nobody would notice the meat stuck on my leg, hopelessly trying to tear it off. I ran in a speed I never thought imaginable for me (or me as Harry Potter), and to my greatest relief, the meat came off, and I ran, and I saw nothing but white light ahead of me...

***
... when I was greeted by the green numbers on my alarm clock flashing 10:30 A.M.

I guess this is my brain telling me to sleep at normal hours.
Soon, brain, soon.

Friday, November 12, 2010

On being "Girly and Purty"

I have, by the grand old age of twenty, pretty much established at this point in time that I am not in any way physically attractive. I mean, yes, there is one individual who will relentlessly say otherwise, but one man's opinion as opposed to others isn't exactly going to cut it. Even parents would call their ugly mess of a child beautiful, after all. Oh well, not everyone is born with mindblowingly hot faces.

I happened to cross paths with a group of boys today, who, if I wasn't being delusional, seemed to point and snicker at a short little girl with glasses wearing a blue and gray striped shirt, jeans, a thick long brown jacket, worn out beige backpack, and white Nike sneakers with pink stripes. AKA me.

I can hear fashion gurus wringing their hands in horror. I admit the color coordination of my attire is pretty horrible. But I also tend to not give a damn on what I'm wearing if I'm busy with school. Damn it, all you need to do is take care of basic hygiene and not be naked to class. I'm studying for exams here! Who's thinking of makeup and jewelry and fashion-conscious clothes when you have stuff to do?! (Also, my laundry wasn't dry yet so I had no other shirts to wear.)

Although I have heard much worse from boys in my lifetime, being a human being with basic social cues, I of course was much irked at such a reaction. Yes, I know  I'm not pretty, you'll probably never "tap that". Can we please move on? You're in college and should be acting more maturely than this.

But alas, I meet the same guys again as I go and print my Psych homework. As I swing the computer lab door open, my eyes meet theirs, and a look of recognition comes to them. They huddle and quiet down. I'm not sure if they know that I can understand them, but I look pretty Korean, so that should be a giveaway already.

(Again, I realize I may be super paranoid and they might not actually be talking about me, but seeing how they laughed at me in the afternoon, the probability is there.)

The guys start talking, leaving out the subject of the sentence (probably because I was in earshot)

"Good enough for you?" says one guy.

"I told you, I'm not settling for anything less than Shin Min-ah!" proclaims the other guy.

"But you're not good enough for Shin Min-ah." Another guy says with a snicker.

"Hey!"

By the way, this is the lovely Shin Min-ah.

(I think she'd say no to college guys, as she's much older and it would be creepy.)

Eh.

Guys want hot girls, nothing's new, end of story. But shoot me if it didn't sting a little.
Perhaps I should have gone straight up tomboy, not giving a damn about such girly matters as beauty and just be proud and manlier than other guys. I already have the voice and an affinity for action to set me off in that route. Also, I'm already "manlier" than my boyfriend in some ways (he knows more fashion brands than I do, for starters.)

I also like testosterone-fueled shows like TTGL. Whee explosions!

But alas, being born a heterosexual girl with a fragment of girliness, I do care. I may do kendo and rave over the manliness of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, but I will fawn over pretty dresses and makeup on another day. And no matter what people say, my face is not something that will magically transform into that of a supermodel if I look at myself in the mirror and talk to myself enough. That's freaking brainwashing, not real life.

So while I detest having to be jeered at by several immature strangers on a college campus, I also don't feel like throwing away makeup and tearing off dresses in rebellion. There are better things to do in life.

So the take-away lesson of today's incident is:

AT LEAST ANIMALS REALLY LIKE ME.

...

*goes to a corner and sighs*

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The World is Big

And we are insignificant specks compared to others. Sometimes we think we're brilliant people, though, and it takes something to occur to humble you and realize that oh, hey, I'm not a big shot after all.

See, it was my grand project to create a blog that explains stuff going on in Korea, maybe comment on several current events or two, receive questions from other users about Korea so that I can answer them. I was foolish enough to think that there wouldn't be any blogs that already did that - at least, any EXTENSIVE, PROMINENT blogs.

Ask a Korean is already such a blog, and damn it, his posts are extremely well written.

You can see in some topics that he really did the research, citing multiple sources and providing extensive background information to the extent that I would not have done, while delivering it all with a witty and objective writing style. Well, damn. It was more than my measly beginnings of a blog could ever have offered, seriously.

And thus, my little beginnings of the Other Blog started to look very informal and stupid in comparison.

And I am now left with a sort of helplessness as I look at my newly-hatched project, shamed before it even had a chance to blossom. What to do?

The quickest, easiest way would be to nip the bud, terminate the embarrassing project and pretend it never existed. Unfortunately, my pride does not settle for quits.

I could, perhaps, amass information to the extent as Ask a Korean and end up as a mediocre (and unintentional) imitation of his blog. But not only is that unoriginal, this guy knows what he does and delivers it good enough. He's a friggin attorney for crying out loud.

Or, I could try to somehow diffentiate the blog somehow, take a slight change in its direction, and see how it goes. While this option seems the most appealing, there is the obvious question of: then how should I go about with my Other Blog?

Oy.

(Edit: Upon realizing that I would not have the time or effort to keep updating my Other Blog in a consistent manner, and realizing that my entries sucked a lot more than I realized, I deleted the Other Blog.)

Sunday, October 31, 2010

(My work schedule is screwed and I need to pick myself up)

Happy Halloween!

May your sleep schedules and productivity not suffer from a messed-up one like mine.

From the lethal pumpkin latte that made me forfeit sleep on Thursday to a late night totally safe party with a few close friends, my sleep schedule is messed beyond repair, and my brain is not working.

I need to produce an essay proposal by tomorrow (I have given up on coming up with one and submitting it today) and I have no freaking clue what to write about.

Meanwhile, I still need to finish my psych paper, and finish a book which I have barely read.

I am only glad there are no exams right now.

In a continuous cycle of super productivity and extreme laziness and slacking off, I have, once more, hit the pits again. Three days have been enough, time to start anew.

...god I have no motiviation. Somebody help me.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

A nice little dinner AND LIKE WHOAH.

After much trials and tribulations - meaning, 1) Neither of us could quite find nice clothes to wear and fumbled around 2) I crashed after a pumpkin-latte induced no-sleep night from Thursday and 3) Finding the right time and place for this FINALLY, Robert and I had a nice dinner and hung out, and while a bit irked by circumstances, was able to talk it out and generally have a nice time.

Which, of course, is not the reason why this blog entry is here.

After enjoying a bit of free pool at UMix, we decided to stop at Pinball Pete's to play some games, while we walked around looking for games to play, I spotted a certain thin, tall man with dark brown hair reaching just below the ears that seemed so familiar...

The guy also looked at me for about three seconds before a glimmer recognition formed between us.

Then it struck me.

Holy shit.

It's Spencer!!!!

(The best rendition of him that I can manage on MS Paint)

Of all the GSIs I've had so far, Spencer is special. Not only is he the first GSI I've ever had, he's the only one who I had for two semesters, the one who caused a minor yet very memorable incident with the exam question on Great Books 2 final, and, of course, his class was the one that Robert and I was in, which made us become friends, and finally, a couple. So yes, Spencer is special.

And, of all the places, he was at Pinball Pete's, right when Robert and I were together.
I cannot believe my eyes.

"Hi, how have you been?" Spencer asks good-naturedly. He still has that nice but awkward-sounding voice as if he's a shy student doing a class presentation OH MY GOD HE HASN'T CHANGED.

"I'm good! How are you?" I try to keep my voice in control, my face straight, anything to NOT FREAK OUT HOLY SHIT IT'S ACTUALLY SPENCER IN FRONT OF ME. Also, I call Robert back from a distance to come over here.

As soon as Robert turns around, I see a transition of recognition - disbelief - amusement in his facial expression, and his face screaming IS THIS SPENCER, REALLY?!

Surprisingly, Spencer also recognizes Robert, and we have some small talk before he asks us the obvious question of, "So, what are you guys doing here together?"

Robert and I look at each other with higly amused faces.

"You see, it's a funny thing actually - we ended up getting together shortly after your class ended."
"Oh, that's so sweet!" Spencer replies, amused at the turn of events.

This moment.

Everybody has a hypothetical moment which they wish would happen in real life so that they'll be thoroughly amused. For about a year and a half, we have conjectured about this moment in our imagination, doing a "Wouldn't it be funny if Spencer knew we got together?", a running joke between us, something to amuse ourselves with.

To add to the amusement, it was not too long ago that we conjectured that Spencer probably graduated by now, and that our amusing notion will forever remain an amusing notion in our collective imagination.

The amusing notion just hit us square in the face in the form of a night in Pinball Pete's.

We eventually part, and when we were in a safe distance from Spencer, we just burst out into giggles of disbelief.

"Holy crap, did that actually happen?!"
"Did we actually run into Spencer?!"
"I thought he'd have graduated already!"
"Oh my god"
"...WOW."

We couldn't quite concentrate in our games, and we remained giggling and just being BLOWN OUT OF OUR MINDS till we reached my apartment, where we continued being Spencer-shocked from it all.




On a completely unrelated note, a skunk had apparently run loose somewhere in Ann Arbor and was letting its aroma linger near the apartment. I have never smelled skunk odor before, and from a far-off distance, it smells like something vaguely toxic burning in a fire.

Also, we got fortune cookies that was creepily accurate for our situations.

For Robert, who bit into an innocuous dumpling from UMix to find it was full of peas, which he is allergic:

"Forgive the action, forget the intent".

For me, who didn't call my parents like I always do on Fridays:

"Most importantly, keep in touch with your family".

A magical night all around, indeed.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

A Weekend of Kendo-ing

...lame title in lack of anything better to name the entry.

Kendo weekend.

This Saturday and Sunday, we had a double-whammy of Kendo tournament and promotion test at MSU. While it was certainly the most hectic weekend ever, the need to study for exams tomorrow is rather interfering with the ability to write a lengthy, thought-out blog, and I don't think I can come up with one due to brain fatigue. I will try to do my best with a journal log-esque entry.

Saturday: Tournament.

1. Met up with people in front of Espresso Royale at 7AM. Early, yes, but not as that of the Detroit tournament, where people had to convene at 5.

2. Ken and Alex came as returning alumni to fight with us! Yay!
We have lots of beginners volunteering, Yay!
Alex: It's weird, I can't recognize about half of these people.
Ken: It's okay, I'm sure they're looking at us and going, "Who are these people?"
I missed you guys. Although it really doesn't show given my nonchalant attitude.

3. EMU: so close by car, you could cry.

4. Matches:
1st match - went against a Korean girl whose rank I could not decipher. But given that I hit some of her blind spots, hoped to at least score points. But she won fair and square, and she eventually went up to third place in women's division, so I guess she was a tough opponent to beat. Earned: bruises on side of chest and waist.

2nd match - MATCH OF PAIN. Went against a guy in EMU, said guy repeatedly slammed the shinai on my right hand and several on my head that hurt. Bad. Also got a nasty hit on my right arm that I couldn't fight for a while. Kiai became very loud and aggressive, because they were SCREAMS OF PAIN. Exited the arena with a loss of feeling in my right hand, swollen right arm, and tears. BRB crying like a baby because it hurt that bad.

(Brian also got a nasty fall on the back on the head after match. Reported extended time of pain and feeling fuzzy. He did not cry like a baby, the brave trooper.)

5. Antai won first place in mudansha divison. Final match consisted of striking two points within a span of about ten seconds. Bad. Ass. Excuse me while mind is blown. Aww yeah, gold medal!

6. Lunch in form of delicious Japanese bento, with large quantities of food to boot!

7. Watched Ken and Matt's matches, attempted exam study, Zzz'ed instead.

8. Team match: against MSU.
Team lost by a point. I tied my match with my opponent, only because she seemed to be at a similar skill level. Feeling a teeny tiny bit proud of not losing points at least.

9. Fast-forward to end of tournament and dinner at Chinese restaurant. Traffic is a bitch, and MSU students were being obnoxious in light of their victory in football match. Oh well.


Sunday: Promotion Test

1. Espresso Royale, 7AM again. Bought breakfast food.

2. Sun was rising as we drove to EMU. Pretty!

3. Panic attack, feeling as if I'll fail. Practice doesn't go too well for me.

4. Dread dread dread. I want to pass, it's only 2-kyu, it'd be pathetic if I failed, dread dread dread.

5. Actual test: did it like I had to. Thought I thought I didn't do too well, fumbled a bit on keeping distance and missed a men strike. Loud kiai to compensate.

6. Watched others test.

7. End of test, went to board tentatively to see results.

8. Huh... wait, did I pass? Whoa, I did! Thank goodness! Yay I have a rank!

9. Antai and Brian passed shodan, Everyone trying for 1-kyu passed 1-kyu. Group cheer and merriment.

10. Lunch at Red Robin, fun times and silliness abound.

11. Returned, showered, napped, blogged. EXAM STUDY COMMENCE.


To rate the overall experience by various divisions:

Improvement of skills: 3.5/5. Definitely improved, but still didn't managed to score point. Will have to do better. Kiai is definitely much nicer.
Promotion test: PASSED!
Fun: 5/5. Was definitely fun, comradery and kendo matches abound.

Overall: 4.5/5

That's all, folks!